it's been going on way too long and i can't take it anymore. now i'm being blamed in lies and sth that i have not done...my only blame would be to pass on to my friend sth that was said about her...but if someone blames my friend in everything bad...then i feel like i have to speak up. and it's just awfully sad that this other person was also my friend...it told him not to tell me anything because i'm good friends with that girl...and if he decided to continue to tell me...then i was put into a difficult position...but i feel i haven't done anything wrong. it wasn't a state secret anyway...she already new that.
it's just sad that my friends are falling apart...that's the last thing that i want. i've been telling everybody million times already that i want to hear no more hearsays or who saw what and heard what...i don't care...i have too much on my mind already...i'm trying to deal with myself and my own problems....i just don't have the strength right now to deal with anything else that is going on...please let me be! that's all i'm asking...
i'm tired of games...i don't want to play...i just want to live...preferably in peace...if my friends can't give me peace then i have to get it for myself by steping one step back. it would be awfully painful step and i wouldn't want to do it...but if this keeps going on...then i'm forced into it. that's how far i have been pushed....it breaks my heart
i will say no more.
ps...i write this in english because i feel i can explain my thoughts to you much better....i just don't have enough words in estonian anymore...
Kommentaare ei ole:
Postita kommentaar